is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
