went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
