my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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