Ambien. No doubt about it.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
