He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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