I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
