She's JV to your varsity
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
