would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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