I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Randomize
