so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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