Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
