So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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