So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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