Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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