He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
