i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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