nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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