What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
