I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
