the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
