He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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