Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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