Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
