Whoa Z and x make the same sound
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize