yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
