If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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