I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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