Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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