I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
