Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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