idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
She announced her abortion via fbk
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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