I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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