Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
