I looked at my own cervix.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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