Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize