What a fucking waste of an outfit
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
