Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
