Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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