More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
