didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
