Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
my shit smells like andre
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
