is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
