You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
