Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
