isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
