i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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