i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
