We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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