Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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