And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
